The Regal Fenway Stadium 13

Located in a mall of four other stores, each one with their own underground parking lot, this is the way of the future, where we can drive like we walk and see movies: aimlessly. It’s awfully expensive for a matinee, but beer.

Protip: the handicapped aisle is the best place to see movies naturally, but you can’t reserve a seat there without my mom to sit in the handicapped seat, and you sitting next to her. Yuck. Instead, pick the seat next to the seat next to the open space for the chair. There’s going to be a lot of people walking by during the film, because of those thirsty-two ouncers, but you’ve got the best seat for a ruined experience.